On this page I am putting some of my most loved quotes from television, novels and movies as well as classic quotes. As with the other pages, should you want to add any to the list, send them to my e-mail address.Hopefully sooner or later I'll figure out how to download .wav files, but until then quotes will jsut have to do. Oh and also, if any of the quotes here have a mistake...please tell me lol.
Quotes From The Dwarf
Cat: ohhh im so hungry...i just HAVE to eat!
Lister: Rimmers dads died!
Cat: well i prefer chicken..
Rimmer: Make a note holly...black border. ahem...To dave lister...condolances on your passing away...
whats that poem...ah...now weary traveler, rest your head...for just like me your utterly dead.
Lister: Ace? YOur knickname was never Ace....maybe Ace HOLE.
Ace Rimmer: Smoke me a kipper...ill be back for breakfast.
Ace Rimmer: Smoke me a kipper....can you do that? Ill be back for breakfast.
Arnold Rimmer: Stoke me a gripper...ill be back for Christmas.
Rimmer: Kryten....unpack Racheal and find the puncture repair kit! I'm ALIVE!!!!
Cat: How am i lookin? (takes out mirror) I'm lookin nice! my hairs nice...my suit is nice..oh I'm just nice period!
Cat: (with a spray bottle) Thats mine...this is mine...
Cat:What are we waiting for? Lets Drop the defensive sheilds!
Kryten: A superlative suggestion sir, with jsut two minor drawbacks. One, we dont have any defensive sheilds,
and two, We dont have any defensive sheilds! Now i realize generally speaking thats only one flaw, but
seeing as its such a big one i felt it was worht mentioning twice!
Rimmer:Is that a cigarette lister?
Lister: No its a Chicken.
Rimmer:(after lister finds out hes three million years in deep space)Is that a cigarette lister...in the drive room?
Lister:Yeah. I stopped for quite a while but i'm back on them now.
Holly: Alright dudes...whats going down in groove town then?
Talky toaster: I do have a third question...a sensible question...one that will tax your new IQ to its very limits...
Holly:This is going to be about waffles isnt it?
Talky:(nervous) Certianly not. and i resent the implication that i am a one demensional bread obsessed electrical appliance.
Holly:Im sorry toaster what is it?
Talky: Ok....given that God is infinite...and that the universe is also infinite...would you like a cheese and ham bravel?
Cat: Its gallows isnt it? Look if its gallows, say its gallows I can take it!
Lister: Allright, its gallows.
Cat:(hysterical) Theyre building the gallows to hang us!!!
Cat:(having found the cigarettes rimmer hid) These are mine!
Rimmer: NO theyre not yours..
Cat: (points to his hand) see this hand? it is mine. (points to cigarettes) see these things...THEY are mine!
Talky:Would anyone like any toast?
Lister:Look, I dont want any toast, and he doesnt want any toast...in fact,
no one AROUND here wants any toast. not now not ever NO TOAST.
Talky:How about a muffin?
Lister:No no muffins we dont like muffins round here. we want no muffins, no toast, no
tea cakes, no buns baps baguets or bagels, no croissants, no crumpets
no pancakes no potato cakes and no hot cross buns and DEFINITLY
no smeggin flapjacks!
Talky:(pause) Ahhh, so you're a waffle man!
Rimmer: So let me get this straight. You want to fly on a magic carpet to see
the King of the Potato People and plead with him for your freedom,
and you're telling me you're completely sane?
Kryten: I suggest switching from blue alert to red alert.
Cat: Forget red alert, let go up all the way to brown a lert!
Kryten: There's no such thing as brown alert.
Cat: You won't be saying that in a minute. Just don't say I didn't alert you!
Rimmer: We can't afford to take any chances. Jump up to red alert.
Kryten: Are you sure, sir? It does mean changing the bulb.
[Looking out a prison window, after being captured by Hitler]
Lister: Hang on, hang on, something's happening. Some kind of parade, or drill, but...
Cat: But what
Lister: Hang on! These guys aren't Nazis. They're all wearing different period costumes.
There's one looking like Al Capone, there's another like Mussolini, Richard III,
Napoleon...smeg, its like all the worst people in history have been brought
together in one place. My God, there's James Last! I recognize him from Rimmer's
record collection.
Cat: What are they doing?
Lister: They're all just lining up in some kind of firing squad. Whoah,
whoah, hang on someone's being brought out. They're tying
him to a stake. It's Winnie the Pooh!
Cat: What?
Lister: Winnie the Pooh, I swear. He's refusing the blindfold.
Cat: They're tying Winnie the Pooh to the stake?
[gunfire from outside]
Lister: [looking shell-shocked] That's something no one should ever have to see.
Cat: I'm so handsome, there's a six-month waiting list for birds to suddenly appear
whenever I am near!
Angel Quotage
Cordelia: See? You can save the damsel *and* make great money. Is this a great country, or what?
Allen Francis Doyle: Hey, let's march down to the bank right now and deposit this beauty.
Angel: You guys go on. I think I'll stay here and *not* burst into flames.
Allen Francis Doyle: Oh, right, you're pretty much the night-deposit guy.
Allen Francis Doyle: She has a certain... charm to her.
Angel: You think she's a hottie.
Allen Francis Doyle: Oh yeah, she's a stiffener, I can't lie about that.
Allen Francis Doyle: [reading a cue-card] Our rats are low...
Cordelia: RATES!
Allen Francis Doyle: It says rats.
Cordelia: What's with those vision things of yours?
Allen Francis Doyle: Well, they're messages I get, from the higher powers, whoever they are. You know, it's my gift.
Cordelia: If that was my gift, I'd return it.
Cordelia: Demons. Is there anything more disgusting?
Allen Francis Doyle: You think so?
Cordelia: Come on. Look at this one. This demon wears a wreath of intestines around its head. I mean, honestly, what kind of statement is this thing trying to make?
Allen Francis Doyle: All I'm saying is, if you and I ever hope to take that cruise to the Bahamas together, we're going to need a lot more clients with means.
Cordelia: And an alternate reality in which you're Matthew McConaughey.
Cordelia: You're a lot smarter than you look. Of course, you look like a retard.
Cordelia: What did you put in her tea?
Allen Francis Doyle: Enough whiskey to drop my Aunt Judy. And that woman had some girth.
Cordelia: What's the point?
Allen Francis Doyle: Well, it tastes good, and it relaxes you.
Cordelia: No, I mean of ever going out with anyone.
Allen Francis Doyle: Well, people need people. And people who need people... are the luckiest p--
Cordelia: Either you like them, and they don't like you. Or you can't stand them, which just guarantees that they're going to hover around and never go away.
Allen Francis Doyle: I hate guys like that.
Quizzerooni!
a href="http://dentonvale.zombiegirls.net/test/rockytest.html">
You are Kathryn Merteuil
Seductive, evil, dangerous.
*~*What Cruel Intentions Character Are You?*~*
brought to you by Quizilla
You are Buffy Summers
Positively gorgeous but oddly sad.
Sometimes you get a little pissy, but all in all
you do a great job of saving the world.
Not to mention all the hot guys you get!
